Lately I have been feeling pretty discontent. What I think I need is something new and exciting but I haven’t figured out what just yet. I’m finally getting back into the habit of taking photos of my outfits which I am happy about because I love documenting my style.
However, I’ve been going through a bit of a style crisis as I feel like most of my clothes don’t suit me anymore. I’m unsure as to whether this is a temporary phase or if I should actually get rid of 1/2 of my clothing. I can’t afford to buy new clothes yet but I’ll probably do a post later this week to show what sort of style I’m after.
Lastly I am in the process of deciding between a name change and a new blog, I’ve been thinking about this for months but I think I’m finally ready to put my plans into action.
I looked up at dusk and this is what I saw.
I really like being out when the sun starts to set, especially if I’ve had a bad day. I feel like it is a reminder that the day is coming to an end. If the sky is changing then so will your life.
Living in the moment
There was a quote from a book I read last year that went something like ‘We shouldn’t always wish to be somewhere we are not’ it then went on to say that we should enjoy the moments that we are in because they’ll pass us by.
It’s easy to wake up and go to school or work but wish you were somewhere else. I can guarantee everyone has done that at least once, me included.
However instead of wishing yourself elsewhere how about live in the moment you are in, make it amazing so that when its over you can say you didn’t let those minutes/hours pass you by. If someone told me this a few months ago I would have said that I’ve tried and it isn’t working (obviously forgetting Thomas Edison’s wise words) and that maybe it doesn’t work for everyone. Funny how things turn around though.
Here are 2 scenarios that I’ve had in my life:
A. You have to go to class whilst all your friends have frees for the rest of the day. You gaze out of the window wishing you were with your friends instead willing for the hour to be over so you can join them.
How about paying attention and making use of the next 60 minutes to learn as much as you possibly can.
B. You are laying in bed with Wonderwall by Oasis playing in the background. You wish that you were out somewhere having fun but instead just wish for the day to be over so you can (hopefully) start fresh tomorrow.
First up ‘stop the music’ now realise that even though your day has gotten off to a crappy start by choosing to live in the moment you could possibly have the best day ever.
Living in the moment isn’t an easy habit to adopt but like most things it just takes practise.
Happy 300th blog post to me!
When I was 11 I decided that I was going to start writing a journal. Less than 2 years later I got my first phone and used it to take pictures but also to take note of thoughts I had whilst out and about. 2 1/2 years later I created my first blog on WordPress a place online where I would share my interests and also write about my life.
Fast forward to present day and I am still doing all of these things. I am on journal number 14 (I think), still take photos and make notes on my current phone and I am still blogging.
I’ve come to the conclusion that documenting my life is not just a habit, it’s instinct. One of the reasons is this fear of growing up and forgetting. When I was 9 or 10 a friend told me how her relative had dementia and I remember thinking it sounded terrifying. A few years ago I sat on my bed writing in my journal thinking that if my memory ever went then at least I would have my whole life documented in my journals.
What I find almost strange is a lot of what has been written in my journals is about being unhappy or unsatisfied and other things that I have struggled with since I was a pre-teen, yet I am so keen to never forget.
Sometimes I feel like my whole life has been spent striving for something just out of reach. Maybe I spend so much time documenting my life because I secretly believe that at some point I will accomplish all that I have strived for and when I do I want to remember what I had gone through prior.
When it comes to blogging I love writing about my life it’s like another version of my journal at times (minus the finer details). I like writing about the ideas and thoughts I have on life because I feel like they are worth sharing and also because I’d like to think that there is at least one other person who has thought the same thing or can get something from it.
This year I also started a scrapbook kinda thing. So far I have only done 2 or 3 pages per month but I enjoy it. Honestly I love spending time doing craft stuff because I feel so chilled doing it and it reminds me of when I was younger. Creating a scrapbook is just another way for me to document the year alongside my journals and blogging.
Writing about my life has helped me become more confident as a person because from doing so I’ve learnt a lot about myself. However I still have a long way to go but it’s all just part of life. The thing that gives me hope though is thinking of how far I have come since I was 11 and that makes me very happy.
Thanks for reading, you are all SPECTACULAR.
Towards the end of last summer I started feeling unwell. I spent a lot of days in bed crying. I felt sad about how certain things in my life had turned out but also angry at myself. I would wake up in the morning and count the hours until I could be asleep again because the days became unbearable. I felt like I had no control over anything, completely hopeless and that I was stuck inside this dark place with no escape.
I was struggling so badly that I did something I’ve never really done before. I asked for help.
Fast forward 5 months later and I feel the best I have felt in a really long time. It is only from having a great day from start to finish that I realised how far I have come since September. I don’t feel like I’m stuck any more and I’m starting to feel like I can cope with life. I’ve turned a page and started a new chapter in my life.
I wanted to share this because one of the hardest things for me was feeling like I was alone and that I was the only one going through this. Something that really helped me was reading online about other people who had gone through/were going through similar things to me. It felt like an invisible hand was being extended out to me.
If you can relate to this post then think of it as me extending my hand out to you and if you want to chat then firstname.lastname@example.org is my email or you can just leave a comment.
That’s all for now,
I’m sitting on my bed feeling reflective listening to Wonderwall by Oasis. I haven’t really listened to the lyrics of the song before but I like it very much.
The past week has been a little strange. A couple of days ago I had a conversation with someone about what I wanted to do with my life. It was unexpected and I was taken by surprise at this persons interest. It was one of those moments in life where you can feel things changing and this time I think it is for the better.
I don’t really feel comfortable talking about myself to other people (sometimes) believe it or not, I know it might be hard to believe since I do it all the time on my blog HA! Anyway I do this thing were I answer questions with ‘I don’t know’ which nearly always means ‘I don’t want to tell you’. Its a terrible habit but I’m working on being more open with people, maybe something good will come of it.
This year my life is going to change a lot, I’m not sure on the specifics but I just know it. I’ll be honest and tell you I’m a little bit terrified. I’m not really accustomed to the spontaneity of life, I struggle to let go and let life do its thing.
Keeping with the theme of change I’m in the process of changing things here on my blog too. I want a new name that is interesting and unusual, like me. I’ve come up with a few ideas so far but turns out they weren’t as original as I thought.
When it comes to change you can either drag your heels in resistance or accept there is nothing you can do and embrace life with open arms and a (potentially fake) smile on your face.
So here’s to letting go, embracing change and being as happy as we can possibly be. In the words of aqualung ‘Good times gonna come’, I can feel it in my bones!
I began blogging (in 2011) with the sole intention of sharing my interests online. I was never and probably never will fit a specific niche. I enjoyed sharing my words and pictures full of hope and excitement when my latest post got 2 likes.
Then I began to discover other bloggers who were much better writers with expensive cameras whilst I was using the 1.3mp camera on my phone. I think seeing how great a blog can be made me want to make my own even better. At the same time though, it was also a little disheartening because in it made me realise that my blog was kinda terrible.
When I began blogging in 2011 I knew nothing about it, I just blogged for something interesting to do. I think I was partly enticed by the fact that I was sharing things with strangers who had no idea who I was as I didn’t disclose my name or face.
When I created this 2nd blog last year I hoped that it would be a success and thrive into greatness. I’d read so many blogging tips hoping that they would be the key to making my blog better. One tip I’ve read many times is that you have to fit a niche. So I thought “Hey since I like posting outfits why don’t I become a style blogger”. I changed my theme and category names and did my best to refrain from posting non-style/fashion related posts.
I failed spectacularly at that which was actually a good thing. As great as it is for bloggers to share tips sometimes it just seems like a bunch of people declaring “You gotta do it like this”.
Over the past 6 months my blog has improved so much. It’s down to my hard work and also being inspired by great people.
Right now I’m declaring CHANGE! I wanted to evoke a heck of a lot more than just compliments on my appearance like “I love your outfit! xx ” from my readers. I’ve always wanted so much more than that.
My blog is for those intrigued by life, people with so many thoughts they don’t know what to do, those that like to wander amongst nature and are dumbfounded at it’s beauty. My blog is a place of creativity and self-expression, if that’s what you like then I think my blog is for you!